So I’m going to be honest I haven’t completely watched a full episode of the show. I’ve seen certain “parts” or segments, but I’ve never had the time to sit through an entire episode. So this is simply my own perspective from the little I have observed about this show. I’ve read many articles speculating about this family, and it all seems to boil down to the fact that the show is really only portraying the more “surface” dynamics of how this works without getting any deeper. We sort of “get” why this man obviously would find this type of arrangement favorable. But for many people, men in particular, the mere premise of maintaining 4 marital relationships and 16 kids is it a bit much… Kody has even indicated that he’d like more children. Now this could boil down to his core beliefs, BUT for the average person this sort of arrangement would become stressful after the “newness” and “fun” wore off. Kody paints everything with a positive attitude, and as something completely doable–something he is proud of. But we don’t really understand why at his age (of 20) he made the decision to have numerous wives, we don’t understand how he isn’t stressed out by it all(we wish he’d at least admit to that) and we’d like to know the depth and “feelings” that he has for each woman.
This is all “touched” so lightly that we really don’t get to see the “reality” of it but merely an “we’re typical, we’re happy, we have normal problems” sort of image. This would be fine, but it’s obvious that this sort of arrangement would have some pretty “major” issues because let’s face it this type of family is NOT the typical family. We see SOME of the advantages of this sort of arrangement. Wife number 2 gets to work a lot of hours without childcare worries, or worrying about who is raising her child. Wife number three gets to stay at home with the children. Wife number one only had to have one child(but she seems most unhappy with this arrangement which makes us wonder WHY she kept pushing Kody to find more wives). Wife number 4 gets a huge ready-made family with an obviously good financial situation. All of these sort of “explain” why this sort of arrangement could be beneficial. But what many of us are trying to understand is:
1. How in the world can they afford 16 children, a huge house, and all of the other financial costs and expenses? I mean Kody drives a luxury car! While it’s clear that two of the wives work, and that Kody works (as a sales man) we’re wondering how even with all three incomes combined–they could afford this sort of lifestyle. I’d like to see more segments on “budgeting”, and the “costs” of such a lifestyle. Because even if the average salesman made 250k to 300k and both his wifes made 60k-100k, they still be considered pretty average in financial footing with a large house and 13 children. And speaking of “costs” who does Kody have on his insurance plan? Isn’t it irresponsible to have so many of his children uninsured?
2. For Wife number 4 (Robyn), why would she bring her three children into this sort of lifestyle, when she clearly did not raise them in such a way? And since I’ve only seen small segments–I may be missing something but is her EX husband in the picture? If he is, doesn’t she worry about potential custody issues, such as the fact that she is in an “illegal” marriage. Wouldn’t that make it so much easier for her ex husband to get custody?
3. Is this really healthy for the children? How does one man (Kody) manage solid loving relationships with each of his 13 children? It’s hard enough balancing a typical 3-4 kid family, but how in the world does he manage to have good relationships with each kid and be a good husband to each wife AND be a highly paid salesman? It just seems far-fetched.
4. Some of the older children are opposed to the lifestyle. I’d almost want to see more of the show highlighting how the kids feel about each “mom” and how they REALLY feel about Kody?
These are really some of the questions that have been plaguing me. And these questions haven’t really been answered or addressed. The Brown Family says that this show was created to “inform” the public about their “typical” lifestyle, but rather than doing so, we’re getting a very “surface” image of what happens in this sort of family unit. How exactly is this informational helpful? If we’re all asking the same questions about this show then I’d say that the show has NOT really painted the sort of “reality” that would help us relate to this family. At least HBO’s Big Love seemed to make much more sense and has a further sense of depth. This show is very one-dimensional so far.